May 28, 2014

nyc

Perhaps I could be that impulsive girl I never am,
visit my dear friend,
wander the city,
find some inspiration,
it's a place of beauty without doubt,
perhaps it'd be good,
I'd make new memories.

May 10, 2014

not necessary

Don't destroy yourself to find yourself, it's not necessary.

it's out there

It made me incredibly happy to see them being happy, dancing to no song in the middle of the kitchen, not a care in the world for those minutes. You learn to cherish other people's happiness, because at least then you know it exists, it's out there.

over and over again

Said it over and over again,
but he doesn't understand,
or he just fails to listen.

May 5, 2014

the reality

You get yourself together,
just to fall apart once more,
the bits of you know where to break,
they've practiced enough,
it shouldn't be a surprise.

tomorrow

If we wake up tomorrow and it's gone,
if it slipped right through our fingers
or walked out the back door,
and you notice,
be kind and let me know,
I'll surely miss the exact moment, 
being unaware or in denial.

If we wake up tomorrow and it's gone,
rest assured we did our best,
I won't regret anything, 
hope you won't either.

May 4, 2014

such a burden

What the hell am I so afraid of? Sometimes I think I set myself back because I'm not sure if I can actually do it, but maybe I can. Because it would be easier to fail telling myself I really didn't put much of myself, but what's the point in that? This is what I wanted, this is what I'm interested in, what I want to know, the only thing I have to do now is convince others why it's important to me and to the world, it shouldn't be such a burden. Worst case scenario, I'll get the idea shot down and I'll get to rise once more.

May 3, 2014

her birthday

It's her birthday today, that website reminded me, but she doesn't get to celebrate it anymore. And it's extemely sad to realize she should be blowing candles and instead she's long gone. I never dared to erase her, I like seeing her name, I like seeing that people still write to her to tell her they miss her. Some people leave this world far too early, leaving marks in people's hearts no matter how long it's been, she was one of those. 

May 1, 2014

the tricks

The tricks your mind plays when you're sound asleep, makes you almost believe. 

reasons to write

Wrote to keep sane,
or question the crazy parts of me.

I loved looking back on feelings,
remembered clearly all the triggers that created those words.

the masks we wear

She told me I looked a little bit sad, I thought I had been good at pretending to be fine. 

Some people can tear down all of your masks.